The College of Raffish Waistcoat Makers and Bematists
Recently, the Professor and I visited The College of Raffish Waistcoat Makers and Bematists in Potterhanworth Booths as guests of the Provost, Professor Tobias Maffled. This hallowed institution is, of course, dedicated to Roland Bell of Blessed Memory and his single, first-class appearance for Surrey. Following an excellent lunch consisting largely of salmagundi and pottage, we were about to take our leave when we passed a door emblazoned with a finely-worked plaque: “The Morton Bailey Memorial Room and Bar”. Two shrouded figures armed with what appeared to be wooden replicas of The Racing Times guarded the door. The Provost appeared embarrassed and haltingly explained that access was forbidden to all but a select few. It is said that a game of milking cromock has been in continuous play in there for at least the last 70 years. The players are apparently replaced occasionally in the event of unforeseen insanity or death. The Professor and I removed our fedoras and bowed our heads i